It was a dark and stormy night ...

It's time to present another flash story, togesther with a nice picture I bought at www.shutterstock.com:

It was a dark and stormy night. Sleets of hail slashed against the window shutters, while the oaken doors moaned under the pressure of the wind.
Larissa didn’t notice the weather.
Instead she listened to the high-pitched keening which revertebrated through the halls and corridors of Glendwanen castle.
Harry trembled and edged nearer to his big sister. “The banshee!” he whispered.
Larissa nodded, her face pale as moonlight, and shuddered. Her hands closed around the shaking shoulders of her younger brother.
Down below in the basement somebody else heard the keening as well.
“Damned!” growled Lord Frederik. “Tomorrow I will definitely oil the door hinges!”

I found this picture by Cartoonresource at Shutterstock.
I think it fit's into my dark and stormy series like it was made especially for this purpose. Do you agree?

Hey, I just discovered this is my 50th posting! So, dear readers, you get another story as my "Thank you!" for reading my blog.

Why dragons eat princesses

It was a dark and stormy night when the young dragon ate his first human. A princess no less.

As soon as he had learned to use his wings his curiosity had driven him into the land of humans. Funny little creatures who scattered like mad hares when they saw him flying overhead. It did cost him some efforts to catch one of them alive, a young male. He had asked the quivering creature why it feared him so much. "Because you eat lovely virgin princesses!" had been the answer. Well, why should he, with herd animals abundant?

He had tried to prove the human wrong. So he had set on a mission to save a princess. There were lots of princesses in the human world, and a fairly big number of them needed saving, princesses who were married of to strangers, brutal primitive men in forlorn fortresses, princesses who were abducted by leery old men who craved for young bodies in their bed-linens, princesses who were conquered by stark dumb hunks who annihilated kingdoms just to possess a princess and rob a treasure. It hadn't taken him long to find a lovely damsel in distress, abducted by a burly renegade knight who wanted to trade her for a ransom of gold. He had smacked the knight unconscious with a single swish of his sinewy tail, grabbed the princess and flown her to his home. All with the best intentions, as it was his wish to talk with her before he delivered her back into her father's gentle care.

Her relocation had been delayed by the brewing storm, which he patiently explained his trembling charge. After recognizing that there was no imminent threat of death, the princess had started to explore his cave. And she head told him in no uncertain terms that his home was lacking. For starters it was way too cold. There was no light. No running water. No furniture. His hoard of gold was too hard to lay on, the stone floor even harder. His choice menu of raw deer flesh was indigestible. His water lacked any real taste. And where were the servants? Her bitching voice had resounded in the cavern like claws screeching on slate. In the end she had grated his nerves so much that he took the only possible means to get rid of her at once.

One bite, one gulp.

Heavenly peace again. Once and for all he knew now why dragons ate princesses instead of saving them.

This originated in "Read an E_Book Week, March 4 - 10, 2012". I made this posting sticky because I want to give you a year-long offer of my free ebook-download. Read and enjoy!
Just discovered that there is such a thing as the "Read an Ebook Week 2012".
More information about his week and more free ebooks to find at:
Read-an-Ebook-Week-2012


I do write ebooks. So I did just put a sample ebook together, with eight very short stories, some already published on this blog, other not yet published. And now I can offer you an ebook (epub, no digital rights management, free to copy, free to distribute, free to enjoy).
Link to my free ebook
For those who surf the net with Firefox: there's a free plugin for Firefox, which allows you to read ebooks in epub format.
Firefox plugin epub-reader

Merry Christmas, Dear Reader!

Here`s my Christmas present, a short story, as usual.

Lovers Plight

It was a dark and stormy night. Howling winds swept the cobbled streets and thrashed the roses in the garden under the balcony, which had just started to open their first buds.

She stared into the threatening darkness and clutched her shawl with trembling hands. Should she dare the forbidden? Could she do it? And... would he really come? Tonight was the night of all nights, or so he had said. In coming he risked the eternal wreath of his father. But so did she. Her fragile body shivered. So much uncertainty!

The roar of the storm rose to yet another crescendo.

Her fingers, which had already reached for the window catch, hesitated. No. He couldn't have been serious. No sane person would risk health and life in such a night. She shrank back to the comforting warmth of her fireplace. Her maid had placed her some mulled wine on the low bronze table. She took the cup and sipped it slowly.

The wind intensified.

For a moment she imagined to hear his voice. Then she shrugged. Romeo was a fool if he imagined her to go outside in such a weather! She should really settle for a more reasonable suitor.

It was a dark and stormy night. Not what she would have wished for her first real rendezvous with Josuah. Despite the late evening he insisted on showing her his favorite spot. A frozen rock pillar next to Barrelman's canyon. She had huddled against the rigid stone, scared to death by the shear drop of the canyon ridge right in front of them. He didn'd notice. Instead he rallied about his future plans. Build a home, marry, raise a family. Oh, fuck it! She had been so terribly cold and lonesome. The man was standing less than two steps away, but a whole galaxy of non-feeling separated them. Merciless stars had twinkled through clouds of red sand which the raging winds throw against her, sand which dusted everything and everybody, making her mouth dry and rendering Joshuah indistinguishable from his surroundings. A moving dark red blotch in a night of dark red dust under a pitch black sky with stars tainted blood red by the same dust which crunched beneath her boots, in a dark red sand-and-stone desert which was dry and cold and would never be a real home, not for her and not for her un-sired children. Hers and Josuah's. It had to be him, there was no other unmarried man left. What fucking madness had possessed her to volunteer for the first spaceship of settlers for the Mars colony?

It was a dark and stormy night, the palm trees shuddered under the impact of the heavy monsoon rain. When a gust of wind extinguished the flickering candle for the third time, Jane closed her book.

"That's it," she said. "No more reading tonight."

Only a pitch-black silhouette in front of the near-black window betrayed the movement of her companion. "All right with me", he said. "We might as well go to sleep, then."

She nodded, then remembered that he possibly couldn't see her in the dark. She opened her mouth - and closed it. She could smell him, a strong male scent which intrigued her. As did his muscular body, of which she had dreamed for a fortnight now. She imagined kissing him, tasting the savage wildness he radiated, imagined touching his sun-tanned skin, his hot body warming her during the early morning cold.

"No," she said slowly, "we won't go to sleep. Not yet. There is another lesson you have to learn tonight. Come to me. Touch me. Allow me to show you the way of human women, Tarzan."

Just a very small Science-Fiction story. No romance today, sorry. Just a computer talking with a lonely human stranded on a strange planet.

Day 1
"It was a dark and stormy night, Sir!"
"Detailed information, please."
Day 2
"It was a dark and stormy night, Sir!"
"Information, please."
Day 3
"It was a dark and stormy night, Sir!"
"Ah. Yes. I see."
Day 4
"It was a dark and stormy night, Sir!"
"Okay.""
Day 5
"It was a dark and stormy night, Sir!"
"Yeah."
Day 6
"It was a dark and stormy night, Sir!"
"Hm."
Day 7
"It was a dark and stormy night, Sir!"
"Shit:"
Day 8
"It was a dark and stormy night, Sir!"
"Whatever."
Day 9
"It was a dark and stormy night, Sir!"
"Shut up."
Day 10
"It was a dark and stormy night, Sir!"
"---"
...
Day 20
"It was a dark and stormy night, Sir!"
"As if that ever changes on this horrid world."
...
Day 30
"It was a dark and stormy night, Sir!"
"Yeah, yeah, yeah."
...
Day 40
"It was a dark and stormy night, Sir!"
"Don't you know any other words for this weather shit?"
...
Day 50
"It was a dark and stormy night, Sir!"
"Give me a break"
...
Day 60
"It was a dark and stormy night, Sir!"
"...groan..."
...
Day 70
"It was a dark and stormy night, Sir!"
"Does this sorry excuse of a fucking planet have any other weather at all?"
...
Day 80
"It was a dark and stormy night, Sir!"
"Hell and damnation! I'll shoot the stupid technician who programmed this fucking computer!"
...
Day 90
"It was a dark and stormy night, Sir!"
"You stupid machine! Dare to say that phrase again, and I shoot you!"
...
Day 99
"It was a dark and stormy night, Sir!"
"That's not worth it. Where's my pistol?"
...BOOOM...
Day 100
"It was a moonlit and tranquil night, Sir!"
...
...
...

The things an author thinks of when she reads a review...

Night Owl Review

It was a dark ands stormy night, cold winds drove gushes of heavy rain about the land. A small group of humans hastened for the relative safety of a small group of trees, turning uncertain gazes towards the sky every time it was lit by crashing lightning. With sighs of relief they entered the grove. Soon they were diligently clearing some space, where they improvised a rough shelter with some horse-blankets. Another blanket was folded and put on the ground inside the shelter, and a slender figure took the seat.
High above them a huge black owl was sitting on the branches of a sturdy oak, watching the scene below with mild interest. It's interest increased when the humans lit a fire in front of the shelter. The seated person, a young, breathtakingly beautiful woman, fetched a small book from her girdle-bag and started to read, while her guards rummaged the horse-bags for provisions.
The black owl opened mighty wings and floated towards the fire. There it dived, it's wings grazing the balding head of the guards commander, and touched ground right in front of the fire. The men ducked for cover, only the commander stood his ground and bared his sword with a snarl.
The owl changed. Wings shrunk, legs stretched, in mere moments a raven-haired, naked warrior stood by the fire. He made a gesture with his left hand. Sizzling witch-fire sprung up. The white-faced commander abandoned his sword and made a run like the rest of his men.
The were-owl turned and scrutinized the lady. She hadn't moved an inch.
Her voice was cold as ice when she asked: "Who are you, and what do you expect to achieve by that indecent appearance?"
"Give me the book!"
"The book? You want my book?" Disbelief was written all over her lovely face. "You must be joking. This is neither a magic almanac nor a pearl of philosophical wisdom. It's just a romance I read for pleasure!"
"The book!" His golden eyes seemed to pry into her very soul.
Unable to uphold her resistance she handed him the book.
He took place besides the fire, opened the book, scanned the first pages and smiled happily. "Just what I need! It's about time I do my weekly review!"

Another little gem of nonsense:

It was a dark and stormy night, when the fair and noble Fey lady Eleanada met her fate in form of a grubby, illiterate, middle-aged human knight, who near midnight pounded the polished wooden door of her home forceful and unrelenting with the brass pommel of his blood-stained sword till she opened, only to collapse instantly at her feet, while his reed blood spilled freely over the white sanded floor underneath her shimmering green robe.
"Are you sure?" she asked incredulously.
Behind her the demon rose.
"Yes, this is the man fate has destined for you, a brave knight who will love you with all his heart, his whole life long, who's children you will bear, and whom you will love so much in return that not even death will be able to separate the both of you."
Lady Eleanada studied the fallen figure at her doorstep. His face was scarred, two days old stubbles of a gray-and-brown mottled beard covered his hollow cheeks, his hands, which still clutched the heavy broadsword, were huge as bear-paws, and his meaty legs couldn't quite hide the prominent bulge at his groins.
"Fat chance!" the Lady told the demon. "I have no intentions to mate with such a brute animal!"
Her tiny, but iron-strong foot shoved the humans prone body back, and with a determined "Thudd!" she closed the door.